wheel

 You know, i always thought that life going to be different each day. But hey, its when on the same. Although you are living with a different people.
 It keeps me thinking, i always know what im doing but i have no idea why, people keep on thinking that im doing it all wrong. Like hey im not that little kids anymore. 
  Sometimes i keep on thinking that i am definitely too young to have been through all this. People who kept on telling me this and that is wrong, its as though they had never been young before. Isnt it funny? hahaha. I cried not because im feeling guilty, its because im disappointed and felt unfair. Why ? Ill tell you guys why. Disappointed because theres no trust. If we told them the truth they would eventually denied that we are telling them the truth. But when we lied, we gonna get fucked down. Am i right? Why im feeling unfair? Because we never given a chance.
  I always thought that getting away was the only solutions. but i was wrong. everywhere we go actually applies the same fucking rules, which i might say all the teenagers would hate. Maybe. But to me, i dont really care about those complied rules and regulations. I only get to a thought, why it seems so unfair and also we didnt given a chance to.
 I am aware that teenagers nowadays are so wild and carefree, but im sure 65% of these teenagers actually knows what they are doing and they aware about their surroundings. I know that these kids are intelligent enough to actually be aware about the motherfuckers are around them.
 I always have this thinking that having friends is a great benefits. Not that im using them, but hey ever thought about it ? when you are in great shit, tell me, will people like your family helping you ? Well, maybe most. But to me, friends are there. Serious shit. They been carrying my back. Thats why the trust for friends to me a bigger than the other ones i ever experience. ( Just base on my experience aye ).
 Its not that I always wanted to have fun, its just called pampering myself. You know, nobody can actually understands you them yourself. Nobody can always be there picking you up unless yourself. Sometimes its feels like, you need nobody in your life simply because you didnt want to hurt them or just simply because you dont want to get hurt of. 
 Im living with someone. Experiencing a new experience they said. But its the same actually. Like i said in the above lines, the rules and regulations are the same.
 All that i wanted people to know is that, im not dumb. i know what im doing. If you guys think that im not worth, let me go. Because im sick and tired living with people who always ordered me what to do and had no intention of listening to me every single fucking day.
 I dont need a rescuer, i need attention. Dont pretend if you know that youre not sincere. I understand. And i know. Its not worth lying. 
 I guess now what i really want is, people stop "caring" for me. Because its too late. I want freedom. Stop asking where i wanna go. Because im not that small kid who still need to be feed breast milk.
 enough said. PEACE.